New Moon

[Beate]

They obviously thought Robert Pattinson might make a surprise appearance.
It turned out that the "something" we were waiting for was Michael Sheen but he was "held up in horrendous traffic". I thought, somewhat uncharitably "Just take the tube, we all managed to get here!"

We did however get a cast member. I didn't quite hear the name but he was British and I think it was Jamie Campbell Bower. Anyway, at the mention of his name

hundreds of girls went "WAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

He said a few words, then we finally got the film.

[Beate]

The film title appears and

hundreds of girls went "WAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Two minutes in Robert Pattinson arrives and

hundreds of girls went "WAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

I thought I am not going to survive this.

Then the actor who plays Jacob appears and

hundreds of girls went "WAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

A while later he takes his shirt off and

hundreds of girls went "WAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

He then proceeds to run through the film semi-naked pretty much non-stop so plenty of opportunity for

hundreds of girls going "WAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Then Pattinson disappears for most of the film so when he reappears, walking in slow-motion (how corny)

hundreds of girls went "WAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

I was ready to kill myself at that point. Some disgruntled audience members, myself included, started to shout "SHUT UP!" but to no avail, LOL.

After over 2 hours the film was finally over, with the last corny line having elicited screams again and we could go and get our phones, which didn't take long at all but was a scrum, with everyone shoving in and out.

[Beate]

Oh yeah, the film. Mindnumbingly boring comes to mind. Illogical, non-sensical and inexplicable, overlong godawful teeny film with some ludicrous fighting scenes where people fly through the air and get bashed into stone columns. That plus non-stop slushy music for all the "romantic stuff". I can only hope the book was any better.

Inexplicably, the OH thought it was quite good although he is not quite the target audience! Kill me now.

4/10

[Sydney_Bristow]

Beate. That good huh?

I remember twilight - that kirsten stewart overacts in my opinion. All she does is stare at the ground, at rob pattercake's chest or tries to do her "deep and meaningful looks"...god help us.

[Beate]

Yes, that good. If I have learned anything from this it's "always keep your ear plugs close"!

Oh yeah, and we got some weird drink called "Kombucha" at each seat, it's apparently a "carbonated herbal tea drink fermented with Kombucha cultures and lactobacilli". The OH hated it, I thought it was the best thing about the screening.

Btw, Anna Kendrick, who plays one of Bella's friends, has a big role in "Up in the Air".

[a_person]

The film title appears and

hundreds of girls went "WAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

I was ready to kill myself at that point.

Mindnumbingly boring comes to mind. Illogical, non-sensical and inexplicable, overlong godawful teeny film with some ludicrous fighting scenes where people fly through the air and get bashed into stone columns. That plus non-stop slushy music for all the "romantic stuff". I can only hope the book was any better.

Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha

This is the best thing I've read in ages! Really made me LOL!

Awesome stuff Beate.

Sorry it was soooo wahhhhhhhhhh!

P.S The first movie was absolute shite as well. Infact your review above is exactly what I thought of th first. A pure waste of time. The second looked better in the trailer but I guess not.

[howyoudoin]

Ha ha ha. Good review of the night Beate. I too cringed at all the screaming but, hey, i'm not a teenage girl.

This screening brings to mind a moral point which i've been meaning to make for ages as far as free cinema tickets goes.

IF you are not the target audience and there is a good chance that you are not going to enjoy the film after reading the synopsis and seeing the trailer, why bother going? Is it just that you (this is 'you' as in everyone) get a kick out of being one of the lucky few to get a free ticket?

Furthermore, taking this screening as a case in point, there were easily 150 spare seats in the whole cinema. Why? Could it be because people just enter competitions through habit whether they want to win or not and on the rare occasion that they actually win, they decide, nah, don't really want to see that anyway. Thus depriving real fans of a chance to go? Hmmmm. Disappointing. There are some kids (sorry loads of kids) who would've chewed their right arm off to be there tonight.

Anyway, after posting on the Offers board today that I had a spare ticket, and not getting any takers, I remembered that my sister liked the first film, so I invited her. We met up,had a few drinks and a meal and sauntered over to the cinema. And we both really enjoyed the film. Apart from the screaming.

It's not trying to be scary, or OTT on expensive special effects, it's just a tangled love story. Which is why the kids love it.

If you want to see a vampire film that is scary AND has good effects, see Let The Right One In.

Sorry I rambled on a bit. Make that a LOT.

All the best everyone,

HYD

[Beate]

I go because I like films and I often surprise myself in how much I like something I wouldn't have gone to if I had to p*y so I give it a chance and if it's a miss, it's not so tragic, I make a funny story out of it!

[howyoudoin]

I go because I like films and I often surprise myself in how much I like something I wouldn't have gone to if I had to p*y so I give it a chance and if it's a miss, it's not so tragic, I make a funny story out of it!

Indeed you do Beate and I thank you for that and for your overall contribution to this excellent website which has become one of my favourites. It's the people who don't turn up who really get my goat. There's just no excuse for it, unless you are taken ill in the hours before a screening.

I'm sure that SFF must be frustrated at the fact that many of their screenings are only a third to half full. Especially when tickets normally go within an hour of being released. With tha in mind, i'm writing an email to them asking them to monitor who has turned up and who hasn't. All it needs is for the cinemas involved to return the printouts of those who have bothered to attend. SFF could then work on a 'two strikes and you're out' basis and ban certain email addresses from their membership.

Obviously, it's not hard for people to work around that and set up multiple email addresses but it should certainly concentrate their minds.

Ho hum. Maybe i'm turning into a grumpy old git.

What do you and others think?

HYD

PS I know that the screening tonight was not organisd by SeeFilmFirst but the same principle applies. Perhaps even more so with competition winners.

[superhero]

I wouldn't recommend writing to SFF, first thing they would do is shut down sites like FMUK,MSE etc! (if they could). Asking them to monitor the tickets more carefully ain't going to help people on FMUK, MSE etc....
Anyway, I have to say Beate, that was one of the funniest reviews of a film I have read on here...